For most of my life, I’ve been searching for answers. Not dramatic, life-altering diagnoses, but something that would help me understand why my body reacts the way it does. Why I've been getting panic attacks and migraines with aura numbness and an array of other scary symptoms since my teenage years that make me question if something more serious is happening. Why my digestion has been unpredictable for years, only to be given the vague label of IBS and told to take a proton pump inhibitor to manage my heartburn. And in the last few years, why I’ve suddenly started experiencing sleep disturbances and sudden heart palpitations—unsettling, and impossible to ignore that sent me to a cardiologist, where I wore a holter monitor for several weeks at a time, tracking every beat. I sat through the tests,  only to be told that everything was 'normal'. But if everything was 'normal', why was this happening to me? The only real solution was offering me a beta blocker to 'calm down'. No deeper explanation, no conversation about possible triggers...

I’ve been through this process many times—seeing doctors, getting tests, and feeling relieved when nothing major is wrong. However, that relief is always short-lived because I’m always left unsatisfied and with the questions. I know I don’t have a brain tumor causing my migraines. That’s reassuring. But why do they still happen to me? What is my body trying to tell me? Other than avoiding the classic triggers: chocolate, aged cheese, red wine, stress...How can I prevent them on a deeper level? I’ve been told I have IBS, but the advice was frustratingly simple: 'Eat more fiber'. As if my complex and unpredictable gut issues could be solved by just adding more whole grains. No one talked about the role of stress, hormones, gut bacteria, or food sensitivities.

It’s the same story with so many of my health struggles. There’s little discussion about what’s actually happening in the body and how we can take proactive steps to feel better.

The “Nothing’s Wrong” Diagnosis

For years, I accepted the idea that if my lab work was normal, if my scans were clear, then that was the end of the conversation. Deep down, I knew something was missing because feeling exhausted, anxious, or bloated all the time isn’t normal. Just because nothing is 'clinically' wrong doesn’t mean I feel 'right'. This is where prevention needs to come in. Not just avoiding disease, but creating a plan for ongoing wellness and that means looking at the body as a whole, not just isolated symptoms.

The Holistic Approach I Wish I Had

Looking back, I wish my doctors had taken a different approach. Instead of just telling me what 'wasn’t' wrong, I wish they had helped me explore what 'could' be optimized. Instead of just saying, 'You don’t have a neurological disorder', I wish they had helped me understand the role of hormonal fluctuations, blood sugar imbalances, and gut health in my migraines. Instead of just diagnosing me with IBS/heartburn, I wish they had talked about stress management, the gut-brain connection, and how different foods affect digestion. Instead of brushing off my anxiety as something I’d just have to live with, I wish there had been more conversation about nervous system regulation, nutritional deficiencies, and how hormone shifts might be impacting my mental health.

Western medicine and holistic approaches don’t have to be at odds. The truth is we need both. We need the ability to diagnose and treat serious conditions, but we also need tools to support long-term health before things reach the point of requiring medication or surgery. 

What I’ve Learned About Prevention

All the doubts have led me on a journey the past few years to get more curious and try to find answers myself. By all means, I am not a medical professional, but for the issues I was dealing with, I knew there were things I can do to help myself feel better. 

I learned that blood sugar stability is crucial for migraine prevention—something no neurologist ever mentioned to me. I discovered that gut health is influenced by the mind body connection, stress, food sensitivities, and hormone changes throughout the month. I realized that my anxiety wasn’t just in my head. That trauma, chronic stress, lack of sleep and nutrient deficiencies were playing a bigger role than I thought.

These were things I had to figure out on my own, but it shouldn’t be that way. Prevention should always be the focus and an integral part of how we approach health.

The Bottom Line: We Deserve Better

I’ve spent too much time feeling dismissed, and I know I’m not alone. For so many women, especially those going through perimenopause or menopause, this is the reality. We go to the doctor with symptoms like extreme fatigue, brain fog, migraines, anxiety, joint pain, night sweats—and we’re told it's just part of aging and that it’s normal. That we should just deal with it or made to feel like we’re overreacting or being emotional. The 'whiny woman' stereotype still lingers in medicine, especially related to the topic of menopause, even if no one says it outright. It’s there in the way our symptoms are dismissed, in the way we’re told to 'just relax', in the way so many women walk out of a doctor’s office feeling unheard and unsupported.

But guess what? Just because something is common, doesn’t mean it’s normal. Just because we’re expected to suffer through it doesn’t mean we have to. Menopause isn’t just about hot flashes and mood swings. It’s a profound hormonal shift that impacts everything—our metabolism, our brain function, our cardiovascular health, our mental health. Yet, there’s almost no conversation about any of it.

We deserve a healthcare system that doesn’t just rule out disease but helps us feel our best. That doesn’t just treat symptoms, but looks at the whole picture. That recognizes prevention isn’t just about avoiding illness—it’s about 'creating health'. 

Until that shift happens in mainstream medicine, we have to take the lead. To ask better questions. To seek out holistic support. To push back against the idea that we should just accept the way we are feeling as 'normal'.